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Jon Osburn and OOIDA’s tour truck, the Spirit of the American Trucker, are at the Petro in Gary, Ind. That’s located at Exit 9 off Interstates 90 and 84. Stop in, say hi to Jon, and join OOIDA for a $20 discount through July. See the full Spirit Schedule. Air date: July 20, 2018.

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Scared? You will be soon …

The season of scare is upon us. So in honor of Trick-or-Treaters everywhere, here’s a list of things to be scared of:

  • People who think EOBRs or ELDs, or whatever the heck you’re calling them now, will solve anything other than the sales figures of companies that make EOBRs, or ELDs, or – well, you get the picture.
  • Clowns
  • People driving trucks who never had any training and found their CDL in a box of Cracker Jacks – or went to some of the CDL mills I’ve seen, which (from what I can tell) is pretty much the same thing.
  • The government of Kansas.
  • Silly trucking research that people actually believe.
  • That nightmare I’ve had about Joan Claybook running around a truck stop waving a baseball bat over her head while screaming incoherently.
  • The inevitable Christmas light shortage (it could happen).
  • More clowns.
  • All the people I’ve met behind the wheel who have millions of safe miles, never, ever caused an accident, and even save people at the roadside – all of them, suddenly deciding to retire, all on the same day.
  • Garden fresh food (process it, hermetically seal it and ship it across state lines, I say!).
  • People in other cars.
  • Counterfeit parts.
  • Parts that are not counterfeit, but just stink.
  • The people who make the good parts running out.
  • Truck parks delivered by clowns (No, I’m not letting go of this one).
  • Bridges that claim to be “safe and sound” when they clearly are not.
  • Potholes bigger than my car.
  • Cars that have way too many dents, but are still on the road (If you have more dents than I have Christmas lights, there’s probably a reason for that).
  • Fast food hamburgers.
  • Clowns who advertise fast-food hamburgers (Try to tell me you didn’t see that one coming).
  • Sneaky toll roads that send you a bill in the mail (plays havoc with my budget).
  • Cargo thieves.
  • Finally having enough parking spaces in the United States, but they’re all in a remote corner of North Dakota (On the other hand, go North Dakota!).
  • My grocery store running out of stuff because all of you decided to take a day off.
  • People who text while they drive.
  • Clowns I have not mentioned yet.

Admittedly, it’s a partial list. But I think that’s more than enough to think about.

Happy Halloween!


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